February In Review
A monthly recap and look ahead: the practice of noticing, ways to make your life feel even more beautiful to you, finding peace, and more.
Welcome to my second monthly recap / monthly look ahead post.
I’m so happy to have you back reading the second edition of this series. My intention is to share this recap the first Monday of every month but here we are on the second Monday of the month. Alas, life needed me more than writing this post. That being said, I’m delighted to publish it now.
This post is too long for email so click through to Substack to read it in full.
As I shared in last month’s recap, January was not at all the month I expected and I went into February hoping for the gift of peace. I’m so happy to say that I think I found it. Was it an easy, breezy, peaceful month? Not even close - we had fevers and stomach bugs take down our kids and we were honestly really busy. Even in January and February, it feels near impossible to not be busy (and I was turning down things left and right!). However, when I really peel back the curtain and look back at the simpler days of the month, the quiet mornings with just Peter (before his big brothers woke), the happy hours spent by the ocean, the not-one-but-two solo nights away from my family in local hotels (how I found myself in this situation, I don’t know but it was fantastic!), and the relaxed evenings that passed by as we watched each day get a little longer, minute by minute, I can find a lot of peace in the month of February. It was a very welcome feeling - to find some peace - and feels important to actually acknowledge those pockets of time throughout the month instead of only paying homage to or focusing on the go-go-go. Less hustle, more living.
I’ve come to find, the thing with parenting and its impact on everyday life is that the beauty in it is not always black and white or always in plain sight. The essence of parenting and family is beautiful and, without a doubt, there are so many golden moments and splendid days that you just can’t believe are part of your life. When I think about those types of days and moments for our family, so many of them are at the beach, which is probably a large part of why we live in Charleston. The truth though is that beauty in the everyday with raising kids is not always right there in front of you, staring back at you. As cliché as it sounds, something I just read last week really resonated with me, “maybe the amount of extraordinary things that happen in your life depends on what you notice.”
I do a lot of my “noticing” when I’m walking or simply staring at my kids, them busying themselves with a book or little project, me looking at them in wonder. I notice all their little quirks and expressions and fall completely and totally in love with them all over again for the one millionth time. The slow down it takes to do this is so invaluable to me. I’m also so grateful we live in a neighborhood that allows me to walk to so many places. I’ll go days without getting in the car and not even realize it. So, when I’m walking home from taking Rowan and Henry to preschool or just walking with baby Peter and thus not chatting, I’m noticing. Charleston is a city ripe for noticing. The architecture, the gardens, the flower boxes, the paizzas, the seasonal blooms, the live oaks, the cobblestones, the water, the salt marshes, the history - there is always something to slow down and notice. I romanticize it all all the time but it is, at its core, romantic.
I’ve been thinking about how noticing and romanticizing go hand-in-hand. It brings me right back to the quote, “maybe the amount of extraordinary things that happen in your life depends on what you notice.” I’d argue this thought process should be broken down further beyond “your life” to “your week,” “your day,” “your afternoon.”
“Maybe the amount of extraordinary things that happen in your day depends on what you notice.”
I’m no expert at this but I find that it really is a practice, a habit, a way of being, and a way of moving through the world. When I get stuck in a state of frenzy and to-do lists, busyness and schedules, I’m not noticing or romanticizing all the things in my life worth loving, honoring, and valuing. I’m not finding beauty in the small bits. To romanticize and to notice is to be present. Being present, in our day and age, takes practice. It breaks my heart to believe that to be true but I think it is. So, I’m consciously trying to move through the world with a bit more grace and a bit less bustle. I think this has a great deal of an effect on my children too. I don’t want them to always hear me say, “we’ve got to hustle” or “lets hurry, we don’t want to be late.” I want to infuse their formative years with the practice of slowing down and noticing the moss growing anew from the cracks between the bricks on the wall. Noticing the way children innately do and putting value there for them. I’m making this a practice for me and slowly, over time, I believe this practice will flower into fullness and I’ll move through the world this way with less intention and more just because it is who I have become. Age gives you wisdom and gives you grace. Winter turning to spring is nature’s way of showing us grace. February to March. It’s happening now.
Things that might be considered “basic” by one entity or another, I think are really little bits of happiness polka dotting our lives. I’ve got a list of such little things that can be made special to help us all notice and romanticize our lives. It’s all about the spin you put on something. Can I turn lemons into lemonade? Can this flickering candle give my room a cozy glow that turns my mood completely around? Here are some ideas for easy yet intentional ways you can slow down, notice more, and make your already beautiful life feel even more beautiful to you (nothing revolutionary here but thoughtful reminders):
Wake up before your kids and have quiet time to yourself to get ready for the day, read, enjoy your coffee/tea, start breakfast, you name it. If you don’t have children, wake up early and have quiet time before starting work or opening a device.
Watch a feel-good movie - I watch The Parent Trap an astonishing number of times every year because it makes me feel downright happy
Fold laundry but while listening to a book on audible you can’t stop thinking about (So you actually want to fold laundry as a means to listen to the book. May I suggest Tom Lake read by Meryl Streep? I suggest it because I adore, adore, adore this book and because even if you read a hardback copy of it, it is an entirely different experience listening to Meryl read it and one you can come back to again and again. So, it is worth buying on Audible, no matter what.).
Throw open the windows around your house
Go on a neighborhood walk with yourself or a girlfriend but without, you guessed it, your phone
Brew freshly made pot of relaxing tea
Light a delicious candle - I light at least one candle in our house every day and I instantly feel better after doing so. It’s funny how that happens.
Pour yourself a glass of wine (bless this wine, I love it so much!) while cooking dinner
Arrange fresh flowers around the house. The husband of my best girlfriend in Colorado has a standing flower delivery for her every Thursday (Thursday? I think it’s Thursday!). I’m obsessed with this act of love. You can do it for yourself too or grab those easy flowers every time at Trader Joes. My mom always has fresh flowers around her house. It is something I associate with her. My parents’ house always feels like home and not just because it is home but because of the flowers, the lit candles, and the little nibbles always waiting on a pretty dish or silver tray.
Sprinkle little nibbles around the house that bring a smile to your face and allow you to always be ready for a pop-in visit. I’m partial to the pressed flower organic shortbread cookies from Carriage House Cookies or chocolates from one of our local chocolatiers.
Do a great exfoliation (worth it, trust!) or a rejuvenating mask (always leaves my skin feeling baby soft)
Write. I feel like I write a decent amount now here with my substack and with my blog (I haven’t been posting as I’m redoing and rebuilding it so stay tuned next month for it to be BACK) but I am considering, for the first time, journaling. I was just talking to Edwin about how I think it could make a big, positive impact on me so I need to drink my own Kool-Aid and slow down to start this practice.
Set a table - nothing elaborate here but a few placemats, napkins, pretty dishes, and beautiful glassware can all make a difference in your mood for a meal at home. It turns the everyday into something special. It romanticizes the everyday instead of taking it for granted.
Escape into a book. I just wrote about a book I completely loved here (under “What Caught My Heart”). I can’t recommend it enough.
Take in your city. Visit a house museum, an art museum, a park or garden, or a farmer’s market. I have no doubt that you live where you live for a reason so celebrate that and make the city yours.
Read the newspaper. We get The Wallstreet Journal Weekend Edition and so enjoy it. I like that our kids see us reading the paper and that it provides them with ample opportunities to do crafts with and on after we read it. Plus, the weekend edition is just great reading.
Master the perfect margarita. Very important information here: the margarita pictured in my above collage is one of my can’t-live-without margarita recipes. Make it yourself to see what I mean.
Read your coffee table books. They are so beautiful and absolutely packed with information, recipes, stories, ideas, inspirations, and more.
In sum, noticing and romanticizing isn’t about comparison, being showy, or tuning out reality. It is about being happy with your life in all the big and small ways. For me, a lot of it comes back to how I want my kids to see me living my life so I can be a powerful model for them. For more on noticing, you absolutely must read my friend Caroline’s Substack, aptly called Noticing. She has an utterly beautiful way of seeing the world.
To recap, February was all about finding peace for me and, as I’ve started the month of March and look ahead to the rest of the month, it is all about noticing and finding romance in the small moments, the moments that are not always in plain sight. I think these two go hand-in-hand. My collage at the top of this post is a marriage of these two things with an eye on spring as it is blooming here in Charleston - all things blue and green, nature’s boldest colors. I’m excited about it all!
As I mentioned, I was graced with two solo nights at local hotels in February and they were so restorative. The first was my staycation at Zero George that was a Christmas gift from Edwin (the one I wax poeticed about here). It was all the things I hoped it would be. I think I’m going to make it a habit at the start of every year because it was just what the doctor ordered. The second was a night at The Dunlin with girlfriends that my lovely friend Jackie organized. Five of us went out for a night for dinner and mahjong (which The Dunlin hosts every Thursday!) and it definitely filled my friend cup. February also brought lots of home cooked meals, new work explorations, and lots of reading and play with my boys. We also started the month in Arizona for the baptism of Edwin’s and my sweet Godson (a major highlight of the year so far!), spent a weekend at Folly Beach with my parents and brother (heaven! The best glimpse at spring and summer to come!), and I presented at The Southern C in Sea Island. It was a really, really great month (stomach bugs and all!).
I’m looking forward to all March has to bring, namely Peter’s first birthday and a few fun things around Charleston. One such thing I’m so excited to share is the opening night party for our annual antiques show, called The Charleston Show! I am on the Young Collectors Committee for Drayton Hall (the beneficiary of the show) so I’m thrilled to extend a code - JE15 - for $15 off your ticket to the opening night party. It is a FUN night with the best group of people. I hope to see you there!
Thank you for reading and for following along with my Substack. I so hope you enjoyed this post. My monthly recap posts are my way of getting my stream of consciousness thoughts down on paper and to share what is restoring, refreshing, and renewing me right now. My wish is that it will stir something in you and inspire you to add a new idea or a little extra bit of beauty to your life. I will see you on Thursday for my next installment of my weekly post, The Catch-Up.
Loved reading every word of this! It made me feel inspired to notice the beauties of life, big and small, and to slow down. And to continue falling in love with life!